Friday Ramble N Scramble: Hits N Misses

Ick. Just…yeeccchhhttt! 🤮

What about youse guys? Ever see a blade like this in Yank Land? 

And another thing!

Stop putting lanyards on yer damn blades!

They’re useless and gay!

The only thing that says “I’m a fuggin retard” more than a minivan - is a knife like this. Look - I don’t give a hoot if you can effortlessly slice through 500 MCM cable with one swipe with this thing. I don’t care how well it holds an edge, I don’t care how well it balances in the hand, I don’t care if it’s all that and a bag a chips! It’s stupid looking, and if I didn’t know better I’d say it was made by Fisher Price! And - they’re all over the place up here in Alberta. Years ago when I saw Skinbag using one I let everyone at the rod n gun club know he was gay. And they all agreed! He’s still mad about it… but it serves him right! And he continues to use it despite my disapproval!!!

😡

Apparently I’m wrong about Fisher Price making them. They’re made by some retarded clam diggers in Nova Scotia…and all their designs are ugly as sin.

Apparently these guys are Canada’s answer to the Buck family and their iconic knives down in the USA.

I’m just not seeing it, myself. I’m a grumpy old fart that wasted his entire life as an irredeemable gun and blade whore. I’ve bought blades and sold them and given them away and made a few myself. As I enter the autumn years of my life… I’m convinced that the best general use blade out there is a cheapo Mora. If you’re willing to spend money I tend toward the elegant light Bowie style blades or the Scandihoovian puukos. 

If you are using a blade like that and enjoying it - you’re wrong. I just want you all to know that. And - I am offended by you.

****

Hmmmpffff. I don’t know much about Thomas or any of the great biblical scholars. I happen to concur with him in that faith and reason seldom disagree. At one time I could have maybe been a disciple - because Lord Almighty… shitty human beings pished me right the hell off. But the socials have utterly destroyed me.

I see the hordes, swarms, and legions of intellectual derelicts, the spiteful mutants, the demons… and I don’t know what you expect me to do about it, Thomas? Is it age? Wisdom? Fatigue? I still get grumpy and irritable the way old men do… but it’s getting harder and harder for me to get mad. Thomas is telling me that’s a sin? I have my hands chock full just trying NOT to be human trash! Forgive me, Thomas, but I don’t have the brain cells to be my brother’s keeper. I already failed miserably as a father. And as a son, my mother is quick to point out…

If I were like you and had my Maker’s Ear… I’d tell Him to flood it again! 😂💨

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Darwin And Murphy Piss Upon Us

I need a fact check on this…? So… she tortured and murdered a classmate  100 years ago. She insists on an all-female execution team. And she soaks up TWO lethal injections… and sleeps them off…?…..??

Unnecessary agony? YGBSM… 

Just send her up her to Canada fellas. We kill shitty old women all the time! We call it MAID (Medical Assistance In Dying). Do it right in the hospital and then it’s off to the morgue in one easy convenient stop!

😊👍

Tells ya what: send Pelosi, AOC and Mitch… we’ll give ya a volume discount! HAR HAR HAR! HAR HAR!

Can you imagine what would have happened if it was an all female firing squad? HAR HAR HAR!!!

😂👍

Clown World continues apace.

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Finer Things: Adventures In EDC

I am known disparagingly in certain circles as a “gear queer”. I bristle at the term - I prefer more polite terminology like like “gear whore”. I love the EDC ‘pocket dump’ vids where the fellas show off all the crap and plunder they carry around every day. We used to do much the same thing on fishin’ trips. Ya got your tackle box out, opened it up and explained your lures to the fellas at the campfire at the end of the day. And then we’d all fight and argue about what worked, and what didn’t and why. Same with the rifles and day packs in fall during hunting season. There’s something cathartic about such discussions. I suppose the trades guys do the same thing with tools and implements. Computer geeks… I wonder if women do it? (They probly sit around and bitch about their idiot men, HAR HAR HAR!!!😂).

So I’m watching Buddy on OyTube dump his pockets and he’s got the gun, mini flashlight, some exotic multitool, a field note pad, and a mini-fountain pen. Well… I thought he’d lost his marbles! The guys even asked him if he was retarded? I dunno about you, but I’ve always hated pens. In summer they blow up in your pocket from the heat and ruin your clothes. In winter they freeze up and don’t work. And fountain pens? Those were always in the wheelhouse of fops and office suits that signed their paperwork with elaborate flourishing finials. I could never make fountain pens work. The nibs all got bunged up and started skipping. But some guys had no problem with them and knew how to make them work. Some guys even had special pens reserved exclusively for signatures. A fountain pen. For EDC.

Hrrrmmmpffff! 

🤨

But the fella was adamant. His handy li’l pen survived and thrived in the EDC role. He’s got a million miles on it, it’s never let him down, and us skeptics could all just go stick our heads down the toilet and flush a few times if we didn’t like it. Believe it or else!

I couldn’t help myself. I bought one exactly like his. I also got a box of ink cartridges. The cap screws together on these - no friction fit. If it does blow up in your pocket the mess will be contained in the pen itself. I watched a few OyTubes on the care and feeding of these things too. There’s not much to them… but I can see why I had so many problems with them as a kid. I think the big thing is to keep that nib clean. Mine is a medium nib … and it writes like a super slick Bic. About the only real gripe I have is that the ink smudges a tiny bit on my waterproof writing pads… which is to be expected I guess? But… for now, I think I’m liking it. A pencil is probably still the best bet for a guy like me… but this might be a great cross over pen for both field and office work. I’m not going to recommend it…yet. But preliminary testing has been positive so far. I am guardedly optimistic to be honest.

****

The snow is gonna fly soon, boys. If ya can… it might be a great time for one last cruise in the hot rod or antique out in the garage. Or in my case, one last ride on the bike in the autumn leaves. Take your girl along for the ride. Or go walk the dawg and have a fall picnic. Time for such things may be shorter than you think. I hope you all have a great weekend and we’ll see y’all next week.

Cheers!

Filthie