If I had It To Do Again

 

My wife and I were in that same situation 41 years ago. A few years younger than her, maybe.  I wasn’t ready to grow up yet either. And gawd we went through some hard times. My family ended badly, but the wife and I ended up reasonably well. The bible and classical stoicism tell us that you don’t compare yourself to others. We are all on different paths.  I coulda done what that young man did. My wife could have made different decisions than she did too.

Years ago during a hunting trip, the father in law and I were sitting by the campfire. He confided in me and said he wished he’d divorced his wife and kids and walked away long ago. I didn’t say anything… what can you say to something like that? I wish now he’d never said it. But I understood. 

If I had known my daughter was going to do the things she did… would I have stuck around? Would I have pressured my wife to have an abortion? The younger version of me would have - in a flat second. If the younger me knew what was in store I woulda gone on a killing spree!!! HAR HAR HAR!!!

😂

But the current version of myself is far more mellowed out. Breaking the rules, I look at others and compare. Status means nothing to me in sizing things up. The world is filled with wealthy alpha males with trophy wives and fast cars and none of them are fit to shine shoes in a whore house. I measure by value. And I assess that value differently than others might too. Given our times, the influences, the people in our lives… I think we did alright? I’m content, anyways. Sure, things could always be better but they could be a helluva lot worse too. 

I wish these two the best of luck. They’re going to need it.