🤨
But when the revolution comes, and it’s time to dispense with liberal pedophiles and other sexual degenerates… it’ll be a handy tool to have around!
The composition and skill jogs my memory. I may know this guy. 100 years ago there was this artisan on the black powder rifle forum. The man was an absolute master with metal. He mastered the air graver inside two weeks. He poosted his progress - and it was a joy to follow his work and watch his skills improve in real time. He was a damned nice guy too and modest to a fault.
His first tour de force was a big engraved Bowie fighter knife, embellished with a masterfully executed image of a Spanish bravo with a sabre held at the en garde. I still remember the title of his poost: “Here’s A POS I did over the weekend…”
Of course we all fell over ourselves to tell him his work was first rate. But he was always taking a modest and slightly embarrassed tone when he submitted his work for our evaluation. One day he did a hawk with scenes something like this engraved on it… and shyly offered it up for the forum’s evaluation. And I couldn’t resist being a dink about it! “I suppose that tomahawk is good enough if yer gonna bury it in the gizzard of a fwenchman or a retard,” I grumped, “but if someone killed me with weapon like that… I’d settle scores with him in the next world, and haunt him the rest of his days in this one…”
The forum stubfarts and retards were incensed. I was told to FOAD, to go suck a fart - and worse! But the artisan saw right through me. He profusely apologized to me and the rest, for wasting our time with his gaudy art, and begged me for pointers on how to improve, HAR HAR HAR! If the retards were angry before… they were absolutely incandescent after that! And so it went for a month or two. In time about half the forum picked up on our gag, and the other half we’re ready to slowly choke me to death! He’d shyly display one masterpiece after another, and I’d talk shit about it!
Things came to a head when he engraved a beautiful lock plate and I reamed him out as usual. He asked me a few questions about artful composition and I poosted a pic of a powder horn I’d scrimshawed by way of suggestions…and it was absolutely horrible. But the artisan praised it like it was more inspiring than anything Michaelangelo had done… and the retards had a collective aneurysm and the rest of us almost died from laughing cramps. The forum moderator finally stepped in and threatened me and my artful protege with a caning, and begged the angry retards to lower their pistols and put their knives away. In time we all got a laugh out of it when tempers cooled.
That was engraving… but this is acid etching. The two art forms are completely different and of the two… this looks far more challenging than engraving… but whadda I know? You have to think four steps ahead, know chemistry, visualize negative spaces… Ughh!!!
The spontoon is not a good fit for me because there are bushcrafting tools that are infinitely superior. But … it would make a dandy conversation and display piece for the den or man cave…
No comments:
Post a Comment