Eat lots of fiber, that helps limit the crust. If it's really hot outside, sometimes you'll sweat enough you don't need to pick the crust, it'll just run down your leg.
A cold water garden house and if your water pressure is at least 125 psi that does the trick, a much cheaper bidet, only problem if you do it in the front of house, neighbors get a little prickly about it...
Once the weather has warmed up, I just drag my ass across the grass before watering. People are always asking why there are dark green streaks in my lawn.
Work up a sweat and fart against a wall. A Hunter Biden painting with every boof! If you're into cave paintings, put your hand between your butt and the wall before farting!!!
Eat lots of fiber, that helps limit the crust. If it's really hot outside, sometimes you'll sweat enough you don't need to pick the crust, it'll just run down your leg.
ReplyDeleteMine is horrible. It always stays moist.
ReplyDeleteI need a bidet… a high pressure one too…
Just use the shower nozzle to blast 'em off and waffle-stomp 'em down the drain!
Delete-lg
A cold water garden house and if your water pressure is at least 125 psi that does the trick, a much cheaper bidet, only problem if you do it in the front of house, neighbors get a little prickly about it...
DeleteOnce a day I just drag my ass across the gravel driveway like my dog.
ReplyDeleteOnce the weather has warmed up, I just drag my ass across the grass before watering. People are always asking why there are dark green streaks in my lawn.
DeleteWork up a sweat and fart against a wall. A Hunter Biden painting with every boof! If you're into cave paintings, put your hand between your butt and the wall before farting!!!
ReplyDeleteOK, that's funny!
DeleteFunny how you don't come across like this on YOUR blog!
It's OK, I won't tell anyone.
Use your wife's toothbrush.
ReplyDelete