Saturday, March 2, 2024

Filthie Has A Squeezebox…



 I think it’s better for everyone when momma has the squeezebox…



Originally performed by The Who…Cheryl Crow does the honours here. The accordion is a capable musical instrument when used responsibly but when it falls into the hands of evil forces…bad things happen. 

100 years ago Skin Head married a fine Ukrainian lass and the wedding went fairly well until the reception. The band was a local one and when the Uke kid plugged his accordion in … the lights in Vegreville dimmed as the local power grid staggered under the load. NOBODY slept that night. I remember staggering around and behind the community hall to puke and found Baloney Bob sprawled with vomit down the front of his tux. “Filthie,” he croaked… “please…kill me…” 

“Did you shit your pants too, Bob?” I replied. We both hurled at that. The next morning I woke up in the back of Bob’s truck. The party was still going on inside, and the kid on the accordion was still belting them out. Back then I was young and invincible; when a plastered Uke farmer offered me half a glass of the hair of the dawg, I guzzled it down. I learned that Ukrainian weddings can sometimes take three days

Accordions are something that are best left in the care of womenfolk.

🤮

3 comments:

  1. Back as a kid we used to joke Vegriville was called Vagrantville given the number of people we saw passed out on the sidewalks everytime we went through there.


    Exile1981

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  2. The only thing the Germans have ever done to piss me off is bringing the accordion to Texas. It was ok until the beanerds started fookin with them and now we hear them in nearly every meskin song. When the accordion player starts then every Hector in a couple miles jumps up and starts yelling "aayyeeee" and whooping and hopping around like a idjit.

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  3. Is Sheryl Crow using toilet paper yet?

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