Would you give your adult children an Easter Basket? What would ya put in it? With my kid? Ughhh…I’ll take The Fifth on that. Adults eat and love chocolate so a little bit of that’s a given. The girls’d probly get a pound or two of fancy coffee, maybe? Maybe a novel? They’d take some careful planning because if yer not careful… you could buy something awful like “50 Shades Of Gay” or, gawd forbid - ‘female gooner monster porn’. The polite term for it is “romantasy” I guess. Probly would have to get the help of the old lady because an effort like this for young women would be truly serious business.
The boys’d be easy - a couple a boxes of 22 shells, some fishing lures… carton of smokes. Go down to Home Despot and just cruise the front aisle for the latest and greatest cheap little gizmos. The little tiny tool collections are a big hit too. Drill bits, miniature pliers n jeweller’s screw drivers - they got all that crap and they tend to go over well. They’ll eat chocolate. Hell… step on their foot, their mouths’ll open up and you can shovel in any biomass ya want and they’ll run just fine on it.
Adult Easter baskets’d be a great way to get a few yuks too with some gag gifts. What would an Easter basket for an old stubfart look like?
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Welp… chocolate is optional for us. Most of us’ll probably be avoiding it actually. A big jar of stinky pickled eggs would be mandatory. It’s Easter, after all - so fuck your triglycerides and cholesterol and man up! Load them up with lots of salt n’ pepper - and let the crop dusting begin! HAR HAR HAR!!! I suppose we could do with 22 shells and lures too. Maybe a box of Brussel Sprouts… a couple cheap cigars. Ya want to keep gifts for cheap and small because we already have everything we need and most of our wants are taken care of. A rotten joke and your time is all we need, when ya get right down to it.
What about an Easter basket for Grandma…? You definitely will want help with that one…
22LR fer sure. Just picked up 2 more bricks of Federal with a $27 savings each. As far as Easter or as they say in the sand box, Ishtar, no one is coming over. 1/3 the family is knee deep into the pagan Easter egg shite and the other 1/3 is in church and the rest of us are enjoying the war news from Iran. Speaking of which.
ReplyDeleteGood news everybody! The jihadis in the UK are streaming back to the shithole they came from to support the IRGC. Hope they get blown the phuc up too. Spread the word everyone. Go back home and fight for your death cult religion. Take your wives, spawn and idiot friends too. The desert sand is thirsty!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bnw8xbzdbfM
Maybe the Israeli dual citz in the US will do the same, but I doubt it! Cowardice is not an virtue.
DeleteChutes Magoo
Happy Easter, Glen!
ReplyDeleteHe is Risen!
Tom762
if you want the Muslims to go home, just boycott their business's.
ReplyDeletedrive them into bankruptcy. they will move overseas. every time you do business with them you fund their terrorism here. don't help them!
I’d welcome a fifth of bourbon, cigars, and a vintage copy of an 80s Hustler magazine
ReplyDeleteI could use some 7.62x39.
ReplyDelete