The job was simple. The kids were going camping. My buddy needed a Cummins 4.5kW genny put in the back of his 1 ton. There was a time I could do it myself. Not gonna lie - it woulda been a grunt… but I coulda done it. But the two of us did it.
And it was a grunt.
At least… on my end. We got it on the tailgate easy enough… but I struggled clambering up into the back of the truck. Damn near broke something jumping out afterward. Not that it’s an excuse…but the truck was a great big jacked up Dodge.
I swear it wasn’t that long ago. I’d a loaded that thing and squared it away faster than you could think about it, and thought nothing of it afterward. A fella really takes such simple pleasures for granted until he can’t do them… or has to struggle to do them.
And… FFS. When I do heavier chores that might need a sudden, explosive use of energy… I’m starting to cut these involuntary little farts. They’re not even funny - they’re embarrassing little barkers that sound like ya stepped on a duck or something. When did that start happening?
I’m telling myself I locked up taking a recovery day the day before. If I’d stretched it would have gone much better. But … I’ve never really had to stretch before.
😡
How soon before the kids start worrying about me trying to do jobs that are too big for an old fart? I can just hear it… “Here, now, Filthie! Let me get that! You’ll shit yourself if you try to lift that…”
Getting old is infuriating and humiliating…
Larry The Cable Guy talked about his grandma being in Bass Pro Shop and ripping one out and they arrested her for stealing a duck call and stink bait. At the ripe old age of 73 I realized that I had unfortunately inherited my old man's asshole. I've started to fart just like he used to do. Faaaaak! Inside my head I'm still a badass...but...
ReplyDeleteI am older than dirt, when I moved to AL there was no dirt... we had to rub the rocks together to get dirt.
ReplyDeletei know Xactly what you mean. 70 years old but just until this past winter when i wanted something moved it moved. what the hell happened?
ReplyDeleteWell, this is the time to kick you while yer down...but getting out of bed was an issue and it hurt. Then, on the way to turning on the coffee, turn on the heating pad that is now permanently on my puter chair, backrest...wait for coffee. A few minutes of heated back resting and it's a little easier getting up. Get the big, beautiful wonderful, coffee, retreat back to chair. Take spas med, hydrocodone and a big red/orange "healthy heart" type jel cap that the wife says will keep me alive long enough to serve her needs. She had major back surgery a year ago, she's still not allowed to pick up more than 10 pounds (she used to help me load generators, motorcycles, 3 wheelers, etc. into jacked up Fords). She has a similar start for her days.
ReplyDeleteSo consider yourself razzed, I'm still recovering from coffee retrieval.
How do you get hydrocodone? There are times when I'd give three years off the back of life for one pill, and my MD won't prescribe it. I gather the government is on everyone's back about prescribing pain pills in the U.S.
DeleteLol, my wife and I are both in our 50s and both have discovered a new condition called "the walking farts".
ReplyDeleteEach step causes a fart to rip usually walking as quickly as you can to the bathroom. Growing old sucks.
This 'gettin' old' business is not for sissies. My friends realized what was going on long before I did, and I'd get quietly edged aside whenever any lifting was on the agenda.
ReplyDeleteI hear that and agree 100% with what you said. This morning, I had to hitch the trailer, buy 15 bales of hay at Tandys and put them in the hay barn. That took about 20 minutes, counting the time to feed and water them.
ReplyDeleteIts about 2 1/2 hours later and my muscles in shoulders and lower back are aching dully. I took a hot shower to relax them but apparently, need additional measures.
Getting old SUX!
I'm 67. Several years ago I bought a hitch mounted deer hoist. It works great for lifting heavy objects into a truck. I used it recently to pull the diesel engine off my BCS tractor to replace a transmission input seal. I think the Amazon seller has never processed a deer, though. Take a look:
ReplyDeletehttps://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B0CMZZ65DW/ref=ox_sc_saved_title_7?smid=ATVPDKIKX0DER&psc=1
You thinking it was hard to lift today, wait till tomorrow. You'll find muscles hurt you didn't know you had.
ReplyDelete