Well the wife tried to drop off a Mother’s Day card and some flowers n’ sheeit last Sunday but unfortunately Mom was too busy to meet. Maybe the wife is on her shit list too?
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Late Sunday night the wife got a text. It turns out Mom was having my brother’s clan over for supper and I get that. She’s an old woman, having someone over for supper is a big chore and they get along really well. As long as the old bitch is alive and in some semblance of good humour - it’s all good.
But I guess after supper Big Bro was going home and spied a hapless old lady and her black lab being attacked by a solitary coyote. With total disregard for his personal safety, Big Bro stopped the car, got out and drove the fearsome beast away and saved the day!!! Mom said that some other old ladies and their ankle biting fifi type dawgs have been menaced too!!!! Me and the Niglet must avoid Dawg Island at any cost!!!
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It’s weird because I’ve caught Mom telling the odd small, obvious lies lately. I don’t challenge her on them and let them pass. Is this Dawg Island business a whopper of her crazed psyche? I dunno? We are close to the rural areas in my part of town. We’ve had moose in the toddler’s playground across the street, I’ve met deer on the walking trails, and a coyote followed me, Macy and Mort around out there once.
I can see them menacing an old woman with a tiny dawg. But… a single coyote? Daring a human and a Lab? Labs are bigger dawgs and if all things are equal…would be more than a match for a coyote. I find myself dubious about a single coyote daring odds like that? They might if they’re sick, I suppose? Or starving…? But there’s tons of rabbits, mice, and even waterfowl on the Island.
One of the games Mom likes to play is compare me (unfavourably) to my brother. It’s actually quite funny when she does it, if you can see past the malice that drives it. The narrative of Big Bro charging in to save the day kinda sets off my BS alarms.
Think I’ll head out that way myself this morn and maybe just take a blade and a pocket full of rocks. I’d much rather have Mort and Macey along…but on Dawg Patrol you roll with the forces you have - not the ones you want!
And if we can’t handle it - I’ll go straight down to the SPCA and draft another recruit!
Yeah. My BS detector is going off all the way down here. Coyotes are smash and grab. I've never known one to 'menace'. Down here what happens is these old biddies walk their yip yip dog along the treeline and a Coyote snatches it and runs away. Or they leave it in the back yard and a bobcat snatches it.
ReplyDeleteMe? I have a two dogs that are 75 lbs or so, and dwarf a coyote - a shepherd/lab/whoknowswhat and a yellow lab. And, they team up when threatened. Last time it was a pack of three dogs - a husky, a pitbul, and a mutt. I'll never forget the look on the pitbull's face when he realized that he FA and was about to have an FO experience. They all trotted away.
Yep. Mom’s starting to loseit. She’s always been a miserable **** but now it’s so ridiculous that I’m actually worried. The quality of her taunts and head games have gone straight downhill I wonder about what other facilities she’s losing. She’s crashed her car twice since Pop passed (small fender benders) and if she were a horse, Big Bro would put her out pasture or I’d send her to the fuggin glue pot! HAR HAR HAR!!!
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I suppose I shouldn’t joke but I don’t know what to do with this. They won’t listen to me so if anything bad happens - it’s on them I guess? All I can do is keep my own nose clean and try not to get any on me when she goes for a chit?
This kind of thing’s above my pay grade.
Filthie, the truth is probably that your brother helped an old lady walking her dog and your Mom embellished it so that "See what a hero your brother is on Mothers Day since I heard nothing from YOU".
ReplyDeleteI think some of this is that she deep down feels bad that you are semi estranged. She can't admit that she was wrong in any way about past decisions regarding your daughter or try to patch things up with you but she still feels bad about the situation.
Well I think you hit the nail right on the head, Jimmy. And hell’s bells… I dunno what to do about any of it. I’m a horrible father because I hate progs and queers, I’m a Nazi because I didn’t take the jab, and I started going to church and hanging out with icky Christians. All this drama used to really bother me but all I can think to do is leave these people to find their own way as I seek mine… and try not to let them piss me off.
DeleteIt’s a struggle sometimes…
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It's hard Filthy, my daughter is on the lesbian train but she knows better than to pull the crap your daughter did to you.
DeleteStill, I don't like it but tolerate the gay thing but her latest "partner" is a 23 year old woman with big boobs, long hair, wears nice dresses and is a decent looking woman but says she identifies as a guy !
My daughter says that this is the sexiest GUY she ever saw and this will be my son in law with tits and a p**** !
The girl is actually nice, works and is good to my daughter but it's always fun when they come to visit because God help me if I use the wrong pronoun. If psychology wasn't so politically correct these days this girl could get some help and embrace being a woman because that's what she is.
I curse the Left Wing bastards that started this and ruined family after family with this crap !
Your mom's probably full of crap (maybe ask your brother for his version of the story), but there's probably a shred of truth to it. From my own experiences with the coyote population in Edmonchuk, these animals have become very acclimatized to humans to the point where they are seeing them as a food source.
ReplyDeleteWhen I worked downtown years back, my partner and I were having lunch when one of these little pricks come within five feet of me, sitting there waiting for me to give him some meat from the donair I was eating. Little asshole wasn't scared of me in the least. I'd say he was probably about 65lbs - quite a bit larger than the ones I see nowadays out in the bush, where they eat field mice, frogs, and maybe some carrion if they're lucky.
I later found out the urban coyotes developed a taste for the garbage that humans leave behind when they don't clean up after themselves, like half eaten food or what's left in food containers. They need to start culling those damn things, but there's no way the pussies who run things in that city will ever think of it. They are using pepperballs and pepper gas right now (a common police riot control agent), but aside from their own limitations, the animals will eventually get used to it, just as humans do.
Agreed.
DeleteI used to see it up at Ft. Mac all the time. The ‘yotes would infest the lay-down yards because the truckers would park and throw them scraps at coffee and lunch time. There were even big signs up on the fences telling them not to do that, but they did anyways.
I suppose I was just as bad; I’d sit in the parking lot at Rotten Ronnie’s and hand feed fwench fries to the ravens that perched on my side mirror. I’m sure a couple would have come home with me if given the chance.
We didn’t see any this morn. Can I borrow your sidearm JL? Do you have anything that ISN’T a 9mm…? 😂👍
Duty issue? No, it's 9mm. Personal stash? Well...I do happen to have a little something useful laying about, but there's good and bad news; the good: it's a .40 cal; the bad (for you): it's a Glock. 🤣
DeleteI'm the good brother and this makes me happy. but it's also a lot of work. I understand your position completely.
ReplyDeleteYeah, it’s odd… I think Mom believes some of her little lies too…?
DeleteI know with the wife’s grandfather… he was a medic when he hit the beaches on D-Day. But in his old age he became convinced that he was a secret agent in WW2 and took orders directly from Churchill, FDR and the Patton. The mother in law said he saw an old Clint Eastwood movie and that’s what brought it all on…
I dunno what’s worse, A? Having a crystal clear mind and presence while your body slowly dies? Or going out without any awareness?
My wife has commented on it too. She’s just showing signs of it and maybe this is as bad as it gets? Or is she going to go like my dad and slowly lose it all one day at a time?
I wish I knew what to do about it…
While I go with the embellishment story, we've had some solid reports of coydogs and or feral dogs around here this spring.
ReplyDeleteOur local liberals even are talking about live trapping them. Where in the hades did they hear about that. Seems killing them is "cruel".
I asked them if I live trap it will THEY ADOPT IT.
Crickets...
Bunny huggers are the worst. The shit libs around here used to give me chit because I was a nasty waterfowler that shot beautiful ducks and geese.
DeleteThen we had a population explosion and the knobs started having to contend with geese in their manicured yards and shitting like… well…geese! The stuff is nasty and now they’re screaming at the County to DO something…!!! Some of the morons were advocating live capture and relocating nests and eggs… and they got mad at anyone that dared to ask how that could be done in real life.
I am convinced the human population needs a major cull much more than the birds do…
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The story was likely embellished, but... in Ohio, in general, coyotes go between 50 and 80 pounds. Up in Michigan the coyotes are cross breeding with wolves, which makes them look like wolves, which are on the endangered species list - so you can't shoot 'em. Legally, that is. The coyotes are getting right with the program, and the idiots who live in Columbus want to preserve them. I'd like to exterminate the lot of 'em - coyote huggers and coyotes.
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry about your mom. There isn't much you can do except keep abreast of her condition and see about medication to slow the deterioration. Then, naturally, you'll have to clear away the wreckage when the whole business goes sideways. You can always pray and ask for a little help. It's what I did, and it worked.