Ughhhh… okay men - let’s be smart and get in front of this. If the hard candy comes round you should be alright. English hard candy’s actually quite good. If it comes outta that tin with a pic of those red coated Buckingham palace guards on it - the guys with those big tall fur hats - you’re golden. No one on earth makes candy better than that.
You never accept chocolates from an Englishman. Or a Scot. Don’t get mad! I’m just calling it as it is. If a frog gets run over on the road in front of their flat, those fuggin guys will go out and scoop up the mess, slather it in chocolate and eat it with relish.
🤢
My own late Dad gave me PTSD doing that one Christmas. That guy would get the worst chocolates you could buy … Pot Of Gold? Ohhh gaaaahhhh… and he’d eat any one of them, it didn’t matter…and he’d LIKE it! “Ohhhh… get these away from me! I’ll eat the lot!!!”
Jesus, Dad! 🤮
Gonna be our first Christmas without Dad. Mom is going to be a wreck…😞
Do you mean relish the thought or hotdog? Merry Christmas to you, the Wife and Mum!
ReplyDeleteChutes Magoo
Little known fact:
ReplyDeleteThe lines on a chocolate can tell you what's in it (if it's done in or by a traditional chocolatier) I dated a chick who worked in one of those boutique store that hand-made them during the pre-DotMil/marriage days... OMG THAT Was a relationshit that I gained weight on let me tell you.
As I can only recall just a few, a round chocolate w/ a "V" on it is a vanilla cream, where as a square chocolate w/the "V" is a vanilla caramel... a rectangular one is a nougat, w/a straight line across it, and there's a bunch of others out there... those however were my faves, so I made sure to remember them.
Y'know, I was trying to find something in my blog bookmarks that'd make me chuckle. This post did. John Wilder rarely disappoints, but you always come through to make my grizzled mug smile.
ReplyDeleteCrunchy Frog is the best!
ReplyDeleteThe bones get under my dentures though
DeleteI quit eating them nasty things cause I always get the one with TOOTHPASTE! But maybe I’ll try and remember the markings like BC said if I run across them and, am feeling lucky!
ReplyDeleteYeah we should demand a strategic list of these things. Eating a Christmas chocolate should not be as dangerous as Russian Roulette…😂👍
DeleteAs a kid I would make a small incision in the bottom of the chocolates to preview its contents, work like a champ till Mom caught me in the act. Oh boy.
ReplyDelete