Sunday, August 25, 2024

Retarded Relics From The Reclusium

The Reclusium is my repository of memories. Somewhere down there are a few of my daughter’s first arrows. I still find Smokey Joe’s plastic cat soccer balls down there. My glamping stove is a big naphtha Coleman my father in law gave us before he turned into a raging asshole. Guns that have not been fired in years. Tools and artifacts from people long gone from our lives. My dad’s favourite hammer… that’s one, at least, that you’ll never get, Big Bro! Some of the memories are bittersweet and can almost evoke tears. Others are horrors.

The kids won’t even get half of these… but you, you old fart?  Oh…you’ll get them…you will get them ALL!!! HAR HAR HAR!!! 

Steel yourselves, time travellers! The past is another country! For awhile… let us go home!!!

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For me the past is better left behind. The slope and trail in front of us gets ever steeper and harder and it would be far too easy to make the same mistakes we made in the past. People are really good at that…or, at least…I am. But - none of us can afford to be timid! We gotta live like we have it all in front of us, and it ain’t over till the fat tranny sings! HAR HAR HAR!

You can stay here and linger for awhile if you wish… but the Niglet beckons. It’s time for Dawg Patrol. Remember to firmly lock the portal behind you on the way out! There are things in the Reclusium that cannot be permitted to escape into our world.
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Have a good Sunday!





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7 comments:

  1. KarlAugust 25, 2024 at 6:01 AM

    Great memory lane post! Those were good times!

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  2. Steve S6August 25, 2024 at 7:14 AM

    Ah, mam... er memories.

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  3. AnonymousAugust 25, 2024 at 7:52 AM

    Silly Putty, for entertainment, Old Dutch nacho cheese chips and Crush cream soda for haute cuisine!

    Chutes Magoo

    ReplyDelete
  4. AnonymousAugust 25, 2024 at 8:27 AM

    Walk down memory lane - thanks for the laughs.

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  5. PeteforesterAugust 25, 2024 at 9:57 AM

    I actually have a half-full bottle of Shinola On my "museum shelf" at work, sitting next to the 1935 western Electric rotary dial phone. The last run of Shinola was in 1963. That means that bottle and its contents are 61 years old! And yes, I know the difference...

    I actually WORKED at a drive-in! Then again, my first billet in the military was as a Teletype mechanic!

    The early Clackers, rattled at just the right frequency, would shatter and fill your eyes with bits of clear plastic!

    That bumper jack is actually NEWER than the ones I used. It actually fit into a slot in the bumper. This supposedly made them safer. The ones in my first two cars just hooked under the bumper. You threw some holy water on the thing and hoped for the best...

    "When I was a kid," Aunt Jemima still wore a scarf over her hair. I never saw her as "black." All I saw was Aunt Jemima!

    ...What was her price, anyway?...

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  6. FidoAugust 25, 2024 at 11:18 PM

    I have my grandfather's old "rotary" phone... the rotary was a generator. Mom's "number" was three longs and a short, but she and her girlfriends from school whould all call each other with 10 shorts and talk all at once... until the "adults" got tired of hearing the 10 shorts... and having to replace the batteries that powered the line... farm life in the 30s.

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  7. Don CurtonAugust 26, 2024 at 3:21 AM

    Oh yeah, the Price is Right. Time to take the Sears catalog to the bathroom again.

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