Wednesday, March 20, 2024

A Fudd Is Born



It had to happen. 

When I was a kid I just HATED it when the old guys came over to chat. FFS, I had a job with crazy hours, a family and chores, limited funds…and at that point in my life, just to get out and put a few rounds down range was a gift from God. And when some retarded old stubfart, smelling of death and excrement came over to piss away my range time with prattle…I resented it. I was there to SHOOT and have some “me-time”. 

Fast forward a few decades…and here I am…a retarded smelly old stubfart that haunts the rod n’ gun club. I’m careful to leave the kids alone. I’m courteous and polite. I’ll talk, but only if they instigate the conversation. I’m not going to tell them anything, the gun thing is about finding your own way and having as much fun as you can along the way.

The other day I took a break from chores on JewTube and was watching random gun vids. I come across one where these two fat young beardos are learning the cool kids everything they need to know about guns. The fat incel says that if you don’t run a red dot sight…it’s because you’re a stupid, obsolete old Boomer!!! The other one that looks like a homeless pedo laughs about an old geezer that said, “dropping a slide on an empty chamber is a bad practice.” 

“No, it’s not!!!” the pedo says. And they both start going at it: Rack, CLAK! Rack, CLAK! Rack, CLAK! Rack, CLAK! Rack, CLAK!

“A-HYUK, A-HYUK, A-HYUK!!! Doesn’t hurt ‘em a bit!!!” They crow, “stupid Boomers!”



Gimme a minute, kids while I light my pipe…


And this morn… I got an earful of well deserved abuse when I made some inappropriate remarks about Glocks. They were over the line and I was a dink to say what I did. We live in an age where no one can be or offended or disagree…so…I apologize: I am sorry that all the black thugs wielding Glocks are stupid, violent morons and crappy marksmen, HAR HAR HAR!!,😂👍


A Couple Notes Upon My Passing

I suppose I am at the age where I can be a nuisance like those old buggers that tormented me when all I wanted to do was shoot… all those years ago… I have a couple notes that nobody will notice or appreciate…but I’ll make them anyway.

  1. Boomers! Leave them kids alone! Nobody wants to listen to your bullshit. The range is for shooting off guns, not your mouth. (I violate this one all the time). Let them find their own way.
  2. Kids - mind your elders. They’ve learned what they know the hard way. They may save you some painful bumps and knocks that you’ll pick up as you reinvent the wheel. It wasn’t until I was in my mid-30s that I was able to appreciate the wisdom of my elders. I am a very slow learner. 
  3. The best gun for you is the one you have. Or the one you’re going to buy. The only catch is that you do your research and put in the trigger time. Be a professional with it.
  4. Be nice to the Fudds.  They are not worth anyone’s time, least of all…yours. But…a few kind words with and for them will usually be gratefully accepted and remembered. By doing so, you do a small honour for yourself and a big kindness to them. One day YOU will be a Fudd, too. It happens sooner than you think.
Welp…there ya go! Decades spent on this mortal brown coil… and that’s all I learnt! Try and keep it fun for everyone if ya can.

Cheers!

Filthie


5 comments:

  1. Mark Twain may or may not have said it, but the sentiment is certainly true: "When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be twenty-one, I was astonished at how much he had learned in seven years."
    Sam Clemen's dad died when he was eleven, but then Twain also purportedly said that "He never let the facts get in the way of a good story."

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. He was an old fart too! 😂👍

      Delete
  2. Ya know, it's a bitch getting old but it beats the alternative. Nice thing right now is it's not supposed to snow until this weekend and I haven't shoveled any for a week.

    And now that I'm an old fart, I guess I'm in a lucky place because as far as guns goes, I'm the go to guy. Didn't ask for it but that's the way it is,

    My tongue gets rally sore when I see the stupidity at the range. But SO FAR I've managed to not pizz anyone off too much. Being go to and having a sore tongue is very hard for me.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I lurk here usually every day. Am a little order than you, but grew up on a farm in a family famous for outdoing each other with raunchy jokes or stories, so I enjoy most of your posts, jokes, memes, and the ones I don't, I just scroll on by.
    Miss Minnie

    ReplyDelete
  4. The 2 bearded faggots were poking fun at massad ayoob, one of the original fudd's and his idiotic statement and video about dropping the slide on his piece of shit wilson combat .45.

    ReplyDelete